Lessons For Afghanistan

Labour and LibDems Kepping the Red Flag Flying Here


The Afghans were lectured and condemned for the corruption present in their elections. The Blair Brown Regime and Fellow Travellers the Lib Dems would like now to teach you the lessons by example.

Thus far,

Bottler Brown has abused a pensioner very publicly.

Labour MP and Lib Dems are under police investigation for breaches of electoral law and identity theft.

British soldiers in Afghanistan are being denied a vote in the General Election

British postal voters are being denied a vote in the General Election

Widespread fraud is anticipated in the postal voting system.

Newsdesk

An Irate Brit on Joined Up Government

Police Spy-in-the-Sky - We Know Where You Live, err maybe


Contributed by Bow Wave Issue 545

This irate letter on Joined Up Government was consigned to
us via Jeff Blum. We believe the items complained of may
also vex the citizens of other countries around the world:-

Subject: Passport Application

Dear Minister,
I’m in the process of renewing my passport but I am a total loss
to understand or believe the hoops I am being asked to jump through.

How is it that Bert Smith of T.V. Rentals Basingstoke has my
address and telephone number and knows that I bought a satellite
dish from them back in 1994, and yet, the Government is still
asking me where I was born and on what date?

How come that nice West African immigrant chappy who comes
round every Thursday night with his DVD rentals van can tell
me every film or video I have had out since he started his
business up eleven years ago, yet you still want me to
remind you of my last three jobs, two of which were with
contractors working for the government?

How come the T.V. detector van can tell if my T.V. is on, what
channel I am watching and whether I have paid my licence or
not, and yet if I win the government run lottery they have
no idea I have won or where I am and will keep the money to
themselves if I fail to claim in good time.
Do you people do this by hand?

You have my birth date on numerous files you hold on me,
including the one with all the income tax forms I’ve filed
for the past 30-odd years. It’s on my health insurance card,
my driver’s licence, on the last four passports I’ve had, on
all those stupid customs declaration forms I’ve had to fill
out before being allowed off the planes and boats over the
last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that
are done every ten years and the electoral registration
forms I have to complete, by law, every time our lords
and masters are up for re-election.

Would somebody please take note, once and for all, I was
born in Maidenhead on the 4th of March 1957, my mother’s
name is Mary, her maiden name was Reynolds, my father’s
name is Robert, and I’d be absolutely astounded if that
ever changed between now and the day I die !

I apologise Minister. I’m obviously not myself this morning.
But between you and me, I have simply had enough! You mail
the application to my house, then you ask me for my address.
What is going on? Do you have a gang of Neanderthals working
there? Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden?
I don’t want to activate rule the world.I just want to go
and park my weary backside on a sunny, sandy beach for a
couple of week’s well-earned rest away from all this crap.

Well, I have to go now, because I have to go to back to
Salisbury and get another copy of my birth certificate
because you lost the last one AND to the tune of 60 quid!
What a racket THAT is!! Would it be so complicated to have
all the services in the same spot to assist in the
issuance of a new passport the same day? But nooooo,
that’d be too damned easy and maybe make sense. You’d
rather have us running all over the place like chickens
with our heads cut off, then find some stuffed shirt
to confirm that it’s really me on the damn picture –
you know… the one where we’re not allowed to smile in
, in case we look as if we are enjoying the process ! Hey,
you know why we can’t smile? ‘Cause we’re totally hacked off!

I served in the armed forces for more than 25 years including
over ten years at the Ministry of Defence in London. I have
had security clearances which allowed me to sit in the Cabinet
Office, five seats away from the Prime Minister while he
was being briefed on the first Gulf War and I have been
doing volunteer work for the British Red Cross ever since
I left the Services. However, I have to get someone
‘important’ to verify who I am — you know, someone like
my doctor… who, before he got his medical degree 6 months
ago, was living in Lahore.

Yours sincerely,
An Irate Brit